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» One Touch Football - Archive » World » The stupidest thing I've seen is......

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Author Topic: The stupidest thing I've seen is......
fritz in a fez
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On one of the back streets of Walthamstow. It's really tight for space, always double parked and has mountainous speed bumps.

In amongst the ford fiestas and vauxhalls and nissans, is some blokes almost new ferrari. I mean WTF... It must be almost impossible to get over the speed bumps and the only times I've seen it being driven its stuck in a traffic jam and about to conk out.

Probably cost about the same as the blokes house.

Posts: 4815 | From: London | Registered: May 2004  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Femme Folle
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He must have a very small penis.
Posts: 18278 | From: the cattery | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
fritz in a fez
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he looks like he's got a small penis.
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Femme Folle
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Small hands and feet?
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Your Own Personal Jihad
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I've got small hands and big feet. What does that signify?
Posts: 147 | From: Between a rock and a hard funk. | Registered: Jun 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
ant259
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You have a very small penis. Sorry, but there it is.
Posts: 1653 | From: Oviedo | Registered: Nov 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Your Own Personal Jihad
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Bugger.
Posts: 147 | From: Between a rock and a hard funk. | Registered: Jun 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
G-Man
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I've got fairly small hands, but when the wife pointed out a dildo to me saying that it was the same size as my penis, I was quite impressed with myself.
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linus
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Travel size.
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Femme Folle
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G-Woman: Mission Accomplished.
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Willie1Foot
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YOPJ;

You have a very small penis, but by Christ those bollocks are HUGE!

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Taylor
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This hand / foot / nose size = penis size thing is ludicrous anyway. If no one in the world had a disproportionately large or small head, disproportionately long or short arms, etc etc, then it would be fine. I think it's hung on because people see a lot of what seems like verification: it's more likely that a man of six-foot-seven who's built like a gridiron star will have what spammers call a "mighty schlong" than some guy who looks like Woody Allen. But variations in proportion (e.g. some people have small hands and big feet, or vice versa) mean that this is far from reliable, which is bad news for two sets of men: smaller chaps with larger penii, who may be overlooked due to potential suitors operating on these dubious grounds, and worse still, brick-shithouse types with small ones, who must be horribly used to seeing an expression of disappointment in lovers' eyes once they get naked.

This point can be more concisely expressed in two words - "Ron Jeremy" - but it's probably better to wade through words than to have to picture that vile hedgehog for any amount of time.

There used to be an equivalent belief that the size of women's vaginas could be judged from the size of their mouths (seriously). This one, weirdly, has died out. I wonder why? It makes just as much sense. To an extent, it's been replaced by the supposition that bigger-built, curvier women will be more biologically accommodating than petite women, which I've found to be equally faulty. Like the "big hands / feet / nose" canard, it's true maybe 75% of the time, but no more.

(In case anyone's wondering why a straight man seems to have inside knowledge of statistics relating to male genitalia, by the way, it's not just based on speculation or eye-wandering locker-room curiosity (which would be dumb anyway, as another great myth is that you can gauge erect penis size from looking at the same organ in its detumescent state) - let's just say I had a very long and drunken conversation with two extremely promiscuous gay men one night, who confirmed much that I'd long suspected.)

I can't believe that I'm sitting here making posts like this on a Saturday night.

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Rogin the Armchair fan
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Women wouldn't like it if there was a direct correlation between hand size and penis size, anyway. "Your cock's the largest I've ever seen". "Yeah, but your tits aren't exactly a handful, love".
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Tee-Rex
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The downsiede is, its difdicult to type wiht these hamds.
Posts: 3795 | From: tomorrow, your time | Registered: Apr 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
The 7th Baron Bartok
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V glad I wasn't drinking coffee then Tee Rex, that was class!
Posts: 4840 | From: London | Registered: Jun 2004  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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