This board has been transferred to www.wsc.co.uk,

    why not join us there

One Touch Football - Archive   
my profile | directory login | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» One Touch Football - Archive » Music » VH1's 100 Worst Videos (Page 1)

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!   This topic comprises 2 pages: 1  2   
Author Topic: VH1's 100 Worst Videos
Nishlord
Member
Member # 97

 - posted      Profile for Nishlord     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Anyone else mooching at home watching it? They might as well call it 'Jesus, Wasn't The Late 80's/Early 90's Grim?'

They're up to No.55 and they haven't shown Unfinished Sympathy yet. That was one shitty video. As if Richard Ashcroft could push anyone in the street without getting his head caved in, the twat.

Posts: 8698 | From: City of Snot | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Don Malhumorado
Member
Member # 63

 - posted      Profile for Don Malhumorado     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I liked the one with Miss Piggy, Kermit the Frog, Ossie Osbourne, David Hasselhoff, The guy from My Two Dads, the comedian with the funny voice, the guy from the film my mam likes, and Gloria Hunneford. Who looked like she'd been superimposed as an afterthought.

And that Lionel Richie one makes me piss my pants. He looks like Mikael Silvestre in a perm wig and dodgy tache. And the clay bust of him, well, what can I say?

And that Tiffany song is brilliant. I loved it when I was an innocent child. I loved it when I was an ironic student. And I love it now. It's great, the video is all American malls and shoulder pads, but even that is comforting in a way. It's like the videos were an after thought. Not like today, where S Club juniors are on a magic carpet flying over Snowdonia, and you're barely meant to listen to the song.

Posts: 14591 | From: Paper Street | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Gordon Bennet
Member
Member # 137

 - posted      Profile for Gordon Bennet     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Have they shown the Brian May and Anita Dobson one from about 1988? Won 'The Chart Show' worst video of the year award that year, it did. Take yer bog standard, hands-held-to-earphones 'in the studio'-style video, add a bit of moody grimacing from the fireplace abuser and the most painful piece of ham jollity ever from La Dobson and you've got yourself a kind of perverse genius.

Set your videos going, just in case it turns up. You'll want to keep it to frighten your children with.

Posts: 750 | From: bad to worse | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Nishlord
Member
Member # 97

 - posted      Profile for Nishlord     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
They've just shown Gazza (Fog On The Tyne), Street Dance by Break Machine, and now Police Officer by Smiley Culture.

This is about, like, 200 times better than the usual output of VH1. Wonder what's No.1? Bet it's Agadoo.

Posts: 8698 | From: City of Snot | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Keli R
Member
Member # 394

 - posted      Profile for Keli R     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
The end of year Chart Show specials used to be spot-on with their "worst video" selections. Whereas most TV shows would settle for showing well-known awful videos accompanying big hits, The Chart Show would go that one mile further, raiding the deepest corners of their archives to unearth the most obscure singles. In the process, they would generally hit upon some of the truly most heinous crimes against music and cinematography.

The selection from 1989, for example, was I Can't Get No by Edelweiss. Note: this is not the group's dire ABBA-plundering hit, Bring Me Edelweiss. Oh no. That would've been too easy. Nope, though it may well beggar belief, Edelweiss had the temerity to issue an identikit sound-a-like follow-up (except with more farty oompah noises) - and that was I Can't Get No. The video featured the band, in traditional Swiss Alpine attire, blowing enormous brass instruments whilst frolicking in mountain pastures and pouring milk from gigantic cans. It was terrifying.

Then, in about 1994, the Chart Show found the video that imho tops the lot. This was the year that Wellingborough's number one son, Peter Ebdon, had gained most notoriety on the snooker circuit for his larger-than-life personality (well, for a snooker player) and unpredictable on-the-table antics. And some inspired joker decided that this was a signal for Ebdon to record and release a single. And thus, Ebdon's indescribably thin cover of David Cassidy's I Am A Clown was born. Now, thankfully for music fans, this unbelievable turkey didn't get a whiff of eau de chart. But such was the devotion to duty of the Chart Show team, that they managed to find the video for this monstrosity. Which comprised a soft-focus, forlorn-looking, Mr Ebdon, in the studio around the mic stand (very much like that May & Dobson video) - yet here's the crucial bit - the studio footage was superposed over cutting-room floor "heartbreak" shots from that year's World Championship - moments considered so tedious or awkward that they didn't even make the BBC's end-of-tournament "highlights" montage.

And thus I rest my case. If VH1 can find a worse, more naffly-conceived video than this (and yes, that includes Bobby Conn) - then I want to see it. Actually, on second thoughts, I don't. I don't think I could cope...

Posts: 1114 | From: Where the streets have two names | Registered: Aug 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
wingco
Member
Member # 93

 - posted      Profile for wingco     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Nishlord, I assume you were referring to Bittersweet Symphony. Massive Attack's Unfinished Sympathy actually has a rather fine video, featuring Shara Nelson walking up a New York avenue, staring straight to camera as she sings and resisting the temptation to barge into oncoming citizens for rock'n'roll effect.
Posts: 4035 | From: London | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Nishlord
Member
Member # 97

 - posted      Profile for Nishlord     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Y'know, wingco, when I hit that post up I kept saying to myself '...Bittersweet Symphony, not Unfinished Symphony......Bittersweet Symphony, not Unfinished Symphony...'

What a gibbon I am.

Posts: 8698 | From: City of Snot | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Amor de Cosmos
Member
Member # 87

 - posted      Profile for Amor de Cosmos     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Havn't seen most of the videos mentioned -- except Lionel Richie. I really hope Cher's oedipal video-rape fantasy involving the entire US Pacific fleet is in there somewhere though. Her son -- a four foot tall dwarf apparently -- plays guitar. Quite wonderful.
Posts: 7138 | From: here you can't get there | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Nishlord
Member
Member # 97

 - posted      Profile for Nishlord     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
There's been some absolute corkers. 'I Eat Cannibals' by Toto Coelo and 'Tarzan Boy' by Baltimora. Thankfully, he wasn't running towards us with his trousers down.

I await 'Do Do Do, C'mon And Do The Conga' by Black Lace with bated breath. In it, they look like the bastard offspring of Lihmal and Su Pollard, and do some quality leering after women in a chip shop.

[ 31-10-2002, 17:34: Message edited by: Nishlord ]

Posts: 8698 | From: City of Snot | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Nishlord
Member
Member # 97

 - posted      Profile for Nishlord     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
10. I Hear You - Marilyn
9. Hillbilly Rock, Hillbilly Roll - The Woolpackers
8. Atmosphere - Russ Abbot
7. Macho Man - Village People
6. Snooker Loopy - Chas & Dave
5. No Way, No Way - Vanilla (Yessssssss!)
4. Save Your Love - Renee & Renato
3. Never Get Ahead - Bobby Conn
2. Do What U Like - Take That
1. Wired For Sound - Cliff Richard

Posts: 8698 | From: City of Snot | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Admin 8
Member
Member # 78

 - posted      Profile for Admin 8         Edit/Delete Post 
"They're up to No.55 and they haven't shown Unfinished Sympathy yet. That was one shitty video."

Walter Stern makes some ace videos. I thought the Unfinished Symphony video was pretty good and fitted the song. Walter Sterns best videos were done for The Prodigy:

Breathe
Firestarter
Voodoo People
No Good (Start the Dance)

I can't remember if he directed the Smack My Bitch Up video (the uncut version was class.)

Posts: 4186 | From: The Delete Key | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
TV's 'Mr P'
Member
Member # 164

 - posted      Profile for TV's 'Mr P'     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
My cousin brought the extraordinary Bobby Conn 'Never Get Ahead' video to my attention the last time this chart was aired a few weeks ago. (For anyone who didn't see it, the 'artist', 'song' and 'promo' must go down as among the most ill-advised attempt at product ever.)

Now that is the kind of thing they need to dredge up for these things - not lazy-ass stuff like Roland Rat or The Muppets, which are clearly aimed at the under-tens...

Posts: 10682 | From: the vaults of the biggest record collection in the world... | Registered: Jun 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Nishlord
Member
Member # 97

 - posted      Profile for Nishlord     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
TVMrP...are you insinuating that Bobby Conn was not taking the piss? That was him? For real? Really?
Posts: 8698 | From: City of Snot | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
TV's 'Mr P'
Member
Member # 164

 - posted      Profile for TV's 'Mr P'     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Well, I cannot claim to know much about Mr Conn, but my cousin seemed convinced that this was a fairly genuine piece, no irony at work etc. Besides, if it weren't bonafide, would VH1 have chosen it? Perhaps they might.

I hope and pray (well, a bit) that it was the Real McCoy. The vid looked a little like those awful US kids' Sunday-morning-TV religious knees-ups to me. (Not seen one? Trust me..!)

Anyway, I must off before I run out of euphemisms for 'genuine'..!

Posts: 10682 | From: the vaults of the biggest record collection in the world... | Registered: Jun 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Nishlord
Member
Member # 97

 - posted      Profile for Nishlord     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
My God. I do believe you're right.

http://www.diskant.net/nopics/red/bconn.htm3

quote:
JG: I really enjoyed your video.

BC: Well thank you. I mean that's, I guess I should explain since people are thinking that that video was deliberate. Like that's just, that video, is an excerpt from a children's dance party show on Chicago Cable Access. And I dunno if you're familiar how cable works in America, you know they, the cable companies, are granted the franchise they have to allocate a certain number of channels for local programming.

JG: Public Access.

BC: Yeah, Public Access, and then you can just have shows and a friend of ours has got this show called Chic-A-Go-Go which is a children's dance show.

JG: How do you spell that?

Weasel Walter: Its like saying Chicago.

JG: Oh yeah.

BC: So he asked me to be on the show that day and I was there with this other character called The Lord Of Lightning who is this kind of washed up, R n B guitarist, sort of in the Hendrix mold. This guy from the south side of Chicago and he released a single in 1985 or 1986 called "I want To Get To Know You", it was like this sort of psychedelic Hendrix riff thing. That was his only single, he comes with this Macramay guitar swing, lip synchs his song and then I come out lip synch my song for an audience of like 8 children and a few adults but the video is like, just that excert, is just like so strange.


Posts: 8698 | From: City of Snot | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
  This topic comprises 2 pages: 1  2   

   Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
Hop To:


Contact Us | WSC

Powered by Infopop Corporation
UBB.classic™ 6.7.2

    This board has been transferred to www.wsc.co.uk,

    why not join us there